The world may be going to Hell in a handcart but the Pansies keep on blooming – year in, year out. I keep them fed and watered and I’m grateful to those who pass by to admire the display. As the New Year dawns and more dark clouds lurk on the horizon, it’s a good time to look back at the pansies that perked the most in 2018. Life is a Cabaret, Old Chum, romped home by a mile. Who knew a drag show in a circus tent could strike such a chord?
As for the also-rans, it’s the usual eclectic bunch – as befits my random rants and ramblings from daily life: cowboys, cross-dressers, the curse of modern parlance, movie misses, gym bunnies, Hellenic heaven, and stories old and new from the Land of the Sunrise.
Life is a Cabaret, Old Chum | Can I Get, Like, a Coffee? | My Brokeback Mountain Moment | Heal Thyself | Pretty in Pink | Do You Have a Tale to Tell? | Is This the Real Life? Is This Just Fantasy? | A Hard Act to Follow | Old Money, No Money | Postcards from Crete
There’s No Place Like Home was the most shared. Similarly, in 2017, it was Home Sweet Home. So I guess there really is no place like it.
And what was the most popular post from years past? For the second year running it’s that 2012 camp classic, Gran Canaria, Sex Emporium. It’s the title that won it. Shame on you.
With 2018 all wrapped up, we’re off to the Ivy for some posh nosh and to see in the New Year. Wishing everyone peace and prosperity for 2019.
It’s been ten years since Liam and I jumped ship and waded ashore to Bodrum. Ditching the profitable careers did little for our bank balance but a great deal for our work-life balance. Four helter-skelter years in Turkey taught us to live better with less – about 75% less, in fact. Our Turkish ride also gave me an unexpected tale to tell and tell it I did – first in Perking the Pansies and then in Turkey Street. But enough about me. What about you? Do you have a tale to tell?
Delicious Bodrum belle, Angie Mitchell Sunkur, recently parachuted into Norwich for a surprise visit. She was a welcome tonic and over a few gins we got talking, as you do, about the good old, bad old days. It reminded her of a soiree with some buccaneering belles and beaus where, as the wine flowed, so too did the stories – stories of fun and frolics, sadness and adversity, love and commitment, courage under fire – stories to amuse and to move, stories that should be heard. It’s a rich seam.
‘It would make a good read, don’t you think?’ she asked.
I jumped at the chance. I am a bona fide publisher after all. Angie knows people, lots of people, so she flew back home to collect the recollections. She’s doing a sterling job and we’ve got a fair few already. But we need more. We’d love to publish an anthology of expat life in Turkey – stories long and stories short. I’ll handle all the boring bits – editing, design, production, publication and distribution – I know people.
So do you have a tale to tell?
We’re interested in hearing from Turkey expats and regular visitors past and present. Drop me a line at firstname.lastname@example.org and I’ll tell you more.
I’m so grateful for my new career as an indie publisher at Springtime Books. I get to work from home (tick) and I get to make a little cash to keep us out of the workhouse (big tick). But I don’t have to attend turgid meetings and pretend to give a toss (tick), I don’t have to listen to some pompous fart who loves the sound of his or her own voice (tick), I don’t have to write tedious business reports that no one can be bothered to read (tick), and, best of all, I don’t have to kiss the boss’s arse (biggest tick). Except for Liam’s of course.
I do, however, get to work with some incredibly fascinating and talented individuals. It’s a pleasure, not a chore, and I’m chuffed to have helped them get their words out there.
As you can see, you can’t wipe the smile off my face. And there’s more to come. Business is brisk.
Author Shelley Workinger runs a blog that provides a unique approach to book promotion – food and the consumption thereof. My expanding waistline is evidence enough of my love of all things culinary, so I bit her hand off to get featured.
Turkish cuisine is justifiably famed as one of the world’s greatest. The Sultan’s table overflowed with extravagant bounty from the vast Ottoman domains that once stretched across three continents. The empire may be history, but food – preparing it, eating it, sharing it – is still of enormous cultural importance to all Turks regardless of status and income. So it’s small wonder the simple act of eating plays a starring role in both of my memoirs, Perking the Pansies and its sequel, Turkey Street. Here’s a soupçon…
I’ve just finished A Turbulent Mind, A Poetry Collection of a Mother’s Journey with Alzheimer’s by Jay Artale who is perhaps better known as travel writer Roving Jay. Her Bodrum Peninsula Travel Guide remains the most comprehensive book about our old Turkish stomping ground.
Jay’s latest work is altogether more revealing. In a series of soul-baring poems, Jay has written a deeply personal account of her mother’s agonising journey with Alzheimer’s, that cruel and uncompromising disease. Candid, sometimes funny and always illuminating, Jay asks the reader to…
embrace the moments of joy that still pass through every day.
The book is currently available on Kindle only, though Jay has plans to publish the book in paperback soon.
Find out more.
On a lighter poetic note, I had the great pleasure to work with author Iona Jenkins on her own compilation – Heartsong, A Collection of Reflections and Poetry. I was delighted to find out the book was a solo medalist winner in the 2017 New Apple Summer e-Book Awards. Fantastic news!
The book is available in print as well as on Kindle and the Kindle edition is a steal at only 99p.
Find out more.
Since 2011, the people at Blog Expat have been shining a little light on expatland by interviewing bloggers from city to steppe, temperate to tropical. They’ve assembled quite an archive over the years. So when I heard they were to publish an anthology of their best stories, I thought it was a good idea. And when I heard they were to include me among the chosen, I thought it was a great idea.
My Life Abroad, a Selection of Expat Stories was published in September 2016. All the participants received a complimentary copy of the book which was a generous touch. Mine dropped on the mat a few weeks back and naturally I gave it a good thumbing. No one could question the book’s scale and ambition. There are abridged versions of 55 interviews and all continents apart from Antarctica are represented. Oddly, though, the contributors are kept anonymous, presumably to protect the guilty.
Every piece is prefaced with an jokey illustration. My own story has two men in summer attire framed on one side by a Shia cleric and on the other by a woman in a burka. Of course it could be a bloke in drag. That’s the point of a burka – you can’t tell. Now, most Turks are Sunnis and I’ve seen more Saudi-style full body bags in Harrods. In my interview I wrote…
Some people show breath-taking ignorance of the Islamic world, tarring all Muslim countries with the same negative brush. No, we aren’t subject to Sharia Law. No, gay people aren’t routinely lynched by rabid mobs of mad mullahs. No, women aren’t forced into marriage as soon as they hit puberty and dressed head to toe in black poly-cotton sheets (well, not in Bodrum anyway). Turkey isn’t perfect but it isn’t Iran.
So I’m hoping the cartoon is intended to be ironic.
Despite the potential faux pas, many of the stories are fun, thoughtful and well worth buying a bookmark for.
I’ve just added a new translate feature to this site courtesy of Google. You’ll find it on the left hand sidebar (click the three line icon, top left, and scroll down). Now non-English speakers from far flung corners of the globe can read my random ramblings. Read? Maybe. Understand? Nope. My liberal mix of double entendre, irony, sarcasm, understatement, idiom and slang is bound to confound. Let’s face it, even some of our Stateside cousins haven’t the foggiest clue what I’m wittering on about sometimes. And, of course, who wants to follow the inane drivel of an ex pretty boy anyway? Feel free to chip in here.
So, will I get the message across? As we say on this side of the pond…
Not a cat in hell’s chance.
Or as they don’t say in Turkey, India, China, Spain, Russia or the Middle East…
Cehennemin şansında bir kedi değil
नरक का मौका में नहीं एक बिल्ली
No es un gato en la oportunidad del infierno
Не кот в возможности ада
ليس القط في فرصة الجحيم
Translating the Turkish version back into English seems to be…
Hell is not a cat in luck.
Sounds Confucian in its inscrutability. That’s Google babble for you. A translation that conveys the meaning of the words; now that really would be something to write home about.